Sunday, November 9, 2008

Declining...

I spent last night (Saturday night) with Mom because her breathing was very irregular. She would breathe and there were sometimes 3-4 seconds between breaths. It was very scary so I felt it would be best if I stayed with her last night. I slept next to her in a recliner and kept tabs on her much of the night. At one point I actually thought she had stopped breathing but she kept up her breathing.

Mom did eat some oatmeal this morning, later on some gatorade and water. While she was sort of awake, she had her eyes open so I put on her glasses. I showed her a magazine cover with the new President as she was always interested in the election and was looking forward to the outcome. She was literally asleep the entire day and was awake very little of that time.

They have her on oxygen this evening just to help her breathing as it is shallow again tonight. She is getting about a 90% normal oxygen intake on her own. Giving her the 'pure oxygen' (whatever the medical terms are) will just make it easier for her. The nurse did say she has seen a decline since Friday.

We'll find out tomorrow if she stays at this Hospice facility or moves to a nursing home.

Sometimes I wonder how I will live without my Mom. I just can't imagine what life will be like without her. I am spiritual and know she will always be with me but not being able to call her or see her is something I cannot even fathom right now. I wanted Eden to know her "Ita" (our family's word for grandmother). Sadly, Eden will not have the opportunity to experience and learn all of the love, lessons, and so much more Mom has in her heart and would have shared with her.

Mom (Ethel) is the rock, matriarch, core, and heart and soul of our family. Please keep us in your thoughts and prayers.

1 comment:

Randi Hempel said...

Jen,
No words can express the sorrow and sadness I feel for you, your mom and the rest of the family. My heart hurts for all of you, especially because I know I would be doing what you are doing and having the same thoughts if I were in your position.

Just know how proud your mother is of you, of your successes, your daughter and the love you found in your life. She will always be with you and with Eden as your guardian angle. You are blessed to have had your mother at your wedding at there to see Eden come into this world. While your little girl will not know Ita well from experiences, she will know her from the wonderful stories and pictures and through your love. Your mother helped to make you such a wonderful person and mother and Eden will feel that love. Your mother lives on in you, in Eden and in Brian, Hannah, Jake and Luke.

Just know how blessed you have been to have such a wonderful relationship with your mother. She will stay with us all in heart and spirit.

Know that my family and I are thinking of you all and praying for you too.

Love and prayers to you all.
Love, Randi